It is a hard truth that few are willing to admit: your inner circle might be your greatest liability. In a society obsessed with image and status, Kenyans are increasingly curating friendships that feed their vanity rather than their growth, creating a toxic echo chamber that inevitably leads to ruin.

From the high-flying boardrooms of Nairobi to the social clubs of suburbia, a disturbing pattern has emerged. We surround ourselves with "Yes Men" and "Hype Women"—people whose sole utility is to applaud our poor decisions and validate our delusions of grandeur. These are the friends who cheer when you buy a car you can't afford, who pour the next drink when you should be going home, and who silence the voice of reason when you are about to make a catastrophic mistake.

The Psychology of Enablers

Why do we do it? Because the alternative is uncomfortable. A true friend is a mirror, and mirrors show flaws. We cut off the people who challenge us—the ones who ask "Can you afford that?" or "Is that wise?"—labelling them as "haters" or "bad vibes." In their place, we install sycophants who monetize our insecurity.

This dynamic is particularly visible in the political and corporate class, where leaders insulate themselves with loyalists who shield them from reality. But it trickles down to the average person. The "soft life" culture has weaponized friendship, turning it into a transactional performance where accountability is viewed as an aggression.

• The Audit: Look at your five closest friends. If none of them have told you "No" in the last month, you are not in a circle; you are in a cage.
• The Cost: The price of vanity friendship is paid in bankruptcy, broken marriages, and stagnated careers.
• The Pivot: Growth requires friction. You need friends who are unimpressed by your title and interested in your character.

Breaking the Cycle

To survive, we must redefine loyalty. Loyalty is not blind support; it is the courage to speak truth to power, even when that power is your best friend. It is time to purge the gallery of applause and invite the critics back into the room.

As we navigate a year of economic hardship and social pressure, the quality of your company will determine the quality of your survival. Stop calling the wrong people your friends. They are not your friends; they are the architects of your downfall, paid in the currency of your own ego.